I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
If you invite me to a bar tonight my liver will kick you in the testicles
Gosh I haven't been pantsless in front of anyone for a while. It's time for me to pick up my game. We need a party. I need some rum.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I woke up to Elf. I don't know which one of you put that in my DVD player when I passed out but I appreciate you.
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
