oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
...so i touched it.
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
could hear acupuncture therapist getting blown in the next room over the whale music
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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