that's an acceptable place to lick
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
That idiot. I'll see him on campus and he'll try and touch me like we're friends or some shit. 1.you're ugly 2. You dropped the blunt in the pool
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Jesus fuck. I just hit on him in front of the whole fire department. They hit the sirens and told us to get a room. FML. I can never go back to that fire station again...
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