I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I blacked out, fell off a swingset, and thought I was Liz Lemon for almost an hour.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
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