Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
The only requirement is that his name is Kevin... All other factors don't matter to drunk me. Drunk me likey Kevins.
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
I was barred out and drunk as fuck locked out at 3am in my Indian costume. It was literally freezing outside. I laid down on the concrete and made a bonfire with dry leaves. Then proceeded to ask.the.bonfire nicely to "please dont go out". Drunk me went strait up survival mode.
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
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