Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
Houston, we have a blender
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
i was drunk enough to give the cab driver my number when he said "you talk like you like guys"
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
quickly learned not to sleep with your roommate and work colleague in the same week
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Btw I thought it was impossible to use up 48 bottles of patron in one night but I was wrong...
Randomize
