i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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