Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Are you alive?
I woke up under the pier.
so...the lady doing my pedi totally noticed the human bite marks on my calf. Who says marriage ends your sex life? Love u!
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
My vape juice got mixed up with the astroglide.
Wow..I bet that tasted bad.
Not tasted.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
Randomize
