A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
