She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I know I said I was done dating 22 year olds but it's not my fault all the guys my age gave up on life and got fat
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Fyi: beer caps are stronger then bathroom counters
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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