it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
it glows. i had to have it.
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
Something bad happened. I'm just giving you some notice. So you can smoke some pot and hide all sharp items in the house.
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
