hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
Randomize