singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
he thought i was a dude.
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
after last night i think it would be a good idea if i wrote a will... you know, just in case.
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Pooping to opera.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
