the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
He's a little cute, in a dorky, I-know-for-a-fact-his-cock-is-huge kind of way
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
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