Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
my mom just informed me my dog smells like cum
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize