Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
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