He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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