I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
Do you realize we just stole 12 dollars worth of quarters each from the office petty cash just to get manicures? New high or New Low?
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
we're making bets on your personal life
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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