Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
thanks for not screaming that I'm pregnant when that guy was giving me his number.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Randomize
