Duck Duck Cougar?
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
Apparently I told his new girlfriend to stop swallowing because she's getting fat. Oh, and I yelled this across a large room
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
There's even glitter on my cock...
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