It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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