You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
woke up with ski boots on and a kayak in my room... birthday successful? i'd say so
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
I feel like a drive thru vagina
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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