he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
he has the hands of the vagina gods.
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
Randomize
