i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
complete strangers are now referring to me as 'the bourbon guy.' i can live with this.
i wish it would rain vodka just once. i have not puked yet bring it on
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
