I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
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