Take 3 tylenol pms and try to whack off before you pass out. It's impossible.
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Just found weed in my belly button. Happy Saturday!
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Randomize