Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
My dick can't jump between your dick and her mouth, man. It's impossible, I think.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
