can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
Randomize
