you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I'm sorry I called your mother a reasonably-priced receptacle.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
Last night when I blacked out, I ate Chef Boyardee. I never want to be that drunk ever, ever again.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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