what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Come on in and take your pants off
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