Your tits are I can't wait for
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Fyi mom and I voted and you're the DD tonight, congratulations
masturbating is 5million times harder to finish knowing grandma is in the guestroom downstairs. just so you know.
Did you ever get our sex tape out of the rental car before you returned it?
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Last night I was introduced as the Picasso of getting fucked up so I obviously had to live up to it by chugging long islands
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize
