Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Its like the two hemispheres of my brain are in a death match but are two evenly matched for either side to win kinda drunk.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
You ate ashes out of my bong
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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