By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
I'm wearing the jeans from casino night. Tell me why I have a napkin in my pocket that says 'dont fear me'? I'm hoping it was just a coincidence.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
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