maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
When someone comes out of your vagina and stomps on your dreams, you'll understand.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
Randomize
