i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
I swallowed your vile semen and you don't know what color my fucking eyes are!?
people are starting to question the shark bite story
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
YAS. BRING CRAB.
MY MOM WALKED IN WHILE I WAS EATING THEM OUT AND STARTED ASKING US ABOUT THE PROJECT RUNWAY EPISODE WE WERE WATCHING EARLIER
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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