I love black thongs
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
I will never swim in a flooded basement again..
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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