One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Why are your underwear on my dining room table?
I hoped the great care he put into rolling a blunt would translate to my vagina.
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
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