so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
I bought left over pizza from a guy on Craigslist.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Randomize
