Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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