I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
I didn't know your ex looked like a male Khloe Kardashian?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
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