I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Todays life lesson brought to you by last nights half pitchers of cheap sangria: you'll never get the stain or the SMELL of sangria vomit out of your bedroom carpet.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
