Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
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