Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I go to a class slightly intoxicated and they bring in a baby. What a life.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Randomize
