He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
Randomize