would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
There are so many birds around me. And squirrels. I feel like that chick from Enchanted...but like if she had a dick and made poor life decisions.
I just put fruit snacks in my sangria instead of real fruit. Its like freshman year all over again..
We couldn't afford sangria freshman year. We're lucky we had fruit snacks..
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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