Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... So sensitive...
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
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