Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Randomize
