It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Well two things you gotta know if you're gonna live here. your alcohol tolerance is gonna need to go up, and people do blow. Get used to it. Nobody is gonna pressure you into it. That shits expensive
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
We're too hungover to prance.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
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