If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
Man I sound like a slutty Mormon
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
