kristin has been a bad kristin
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Randomize
