white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I sent out a mass text that said "margaritas for Jesus?" and nobody responded, worst Easter ever.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I gave him head and we watched Fashion Police. somehow it wasn't awkard.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I think we should get high on adderall and nair each other again for New years.
She is watching her grandpa for the day and the dude just whipped it out and started jerking off while watching the View.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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